November 11, 2009, Remembrance Day. I was, coincidentally? with the same friend at Cardel Place, a large recreational centre with a pool, arena, gymnasiums, climbing walls, etc. I was about six months pregnant with Googa and we had all just finished swimming and were in the change room getting dressed. My big mistake was to get Lemon Boy dressed first. There are no doors on the change rooms, just a curvy hallway so you can't see in and Lemon Boy ran out while I was struggling into my maternity jeans. I still had to put on a shirt before I could chase him out into the hallway. When I got out of the change room, I asked the clerk at the till if she'd seen a small boy running around, "yeah" she replied, "I think he ran up the ramp" REALLY?? I think to myself, and you didn't think to stop a two year old running around by himself??
So I hurry up the ramp as fast as I can and when I get to the top there are about six different directions he could have gone in and I don't see him anywhere so I ask a couple of people sitting there if they've seen a small boy run by and no, they have not.
At this point I remember seeing an Information Desk across from me, running over, saying "I've lost my little boy" and losing it at that point. I'm grabbing my stomach and sobbing that he's run away and I can't find him. The staff were so professional, they have obviously trained for situations like this. One staff member helps me sit down and the other gets on her radio right away, code yellow, everyone search their stations for a two year old boy, green hoody, blue jeans, mickey mouse belt. They reassure me that they'll have the whole building searched, someone even searches outside.
My friend is sitting beside me with her little boy, I'm sobbing hysterically and she's not saying much, really, what can you say at this point? I phone Claudio on my cell and tell him I've lost our son. He had no vehicle where he was so all he could do was pray with me and then I told him I'd call him once anything happened. I vividly recall sitting there, as time sat still, and all I could think was ANYTHING. I'd give anything to have him back in my arms. My car? without a second thought. My house? in a heartbeat. My money, nice clothes, all my possessions? no question. In this moment, what mattered most to me became more apparent then it ever had before. Of course I always knew I treasured my family more than any possessions but this was REAL. A real sense of KNOWING. All those petty things which had worried me in the past, jealous comparisons with what other people had, smug feelings about the nice car we had just gotten, job frustrations, family squabbles, all of this mattered nothing and I realized how quickly life could change.
At this point a manager approaches me and tells me it's been 15 minutes since I've reported him missing and now we need to call the police. I numbly follow him to an office where they've dialed 911 for me. I tell the dispatcher what has happened, describe Lemon Boy again and I've been on the phone with him for about five minutes when I hear someone ask "what colour shoes is he wearing?" What colour shoes IS he wearing?? I have to think for a moment... Bright orange! That's right, he's wearing the shoes his Appy brought him back from Chile, very distinguishable. At that moment I hear the words I've been holding my breath for "I've got him" comes over the radio and in two minutes he's being carried into the office, looking a little confused but not too concerned... until he sees my face. "Mama, what wrong?" "Oh baby, I thought you were lost!" "I not lost Mama, I playing" He had somehow managed to get into the arena and into one of the change rooms there and was playing in the lockers with a bunch of other kids!
The sense of relief is indescribable. The phone call to Claudio the best one I've ever made "He's found!" Once again the world is right side up, I'm exhausted, trembling and limp but somehow I say good bye to my friend, get Lemon Boy in the car and we drive to Claudio so he can hold his boy in his arms and say a prayer of thanks to God for keeping him safe.
This was a very vivid and defining moment in my life, one I'll never forget. Yet somehow the petty worries still creep back into my thoughts. The jealous feelings still float around my mind and trivial matters take up more time and energy then they should. Yet today, in the moment it took between realizing Lemon Boy wasn't where I thought he was and him jumping out and shouting "boo!" it all came back to me. Once again I am reminded about what's important. Thank you God for keeping my boys safe and for helping me remember what really matters.
And of course the ONE who created us, who loves us with an unfailing love. Without Jesus I am nothing.
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